Time. Goes. Slowly.

So I'm hanging in there and waiting until next Saturday when we can go for bloodwork to see just how we're doing. I talk to my embies (anyone else do this) and tell them that I love them and want them to do their best to stick. Here's praying that one will...

** Warning, this might be Too Might Info... =) **

Last night had a bit of a scare where I swore my cycle was starting. I mean the heavy feeling, the "moist" feeling and the worry about going to the restroom to only find a horrible outcome. Anyone know what I'm talking about? I had a little brown discharge last night and nothing since then. And this morning I woke up to HORRIBLE gas/lower ab crampage that scared the begeezers out of me only to have one HECK of a *ahem* movement and man did I feel better. It had been over 3 days... Progesterone sucks in that regard.

So, dare I hope for implantation bleeding? *fingers crossed*

Progesterone Shots (PIOs)

Ever wonder what the progesterone injections look like? Well, snapped a photo tonight and thought I'd show and tell. You draw up the oil with a different (bigger) needle and then inject it as shown below. It seems that if I heat prior to and after and wiggle my toes during (you can't tense your butt if you do it!) that they aren't really that bad. Repronex is still by far the nasty fellow of the bunch!

An Award ...

Thank you so much to Tiffany over at Young but Infertile for this fantastic award. Be sure to check out her blog if you're not already familiar with it!

I have to list 10 Things That Make My Day and then list 10 Blogs worthy of this award as well, and then you'll have the award and they'll have the award too. Don't forget you'll have to do the same... list 10 Things and 10 Blogs to earn the award (then of course copy the pic of the award to your computer and paste/upload the award pic to your own blog post saying that you received this award with your 10 and 10).

10 Things That Make My Day:
1. Gummy Bears/Cheesecake
2. My husband's smile
3. Curling up with a purring best friend
4. Getting deep into a great book
5. Balloons
6. Sitting in the sun
7. Playing pitch with family and friends
8. Hearing "I love you" from others
9. Getting "real mail" in the mailbox
10. Watching Sheldon on the Big Bang Theory :)

And I'm sorry I'm going to let some people down... but I only follow 3 blogs...
1. Shanny at I did, I do, I will
2. Tiffany at Young but Infertile
3. Sarah at Hoping for a baby Smith

Tired, Cranky, Lightheaded...

Made it back to work today and felt really beat down. I just wanted to go home and curl up with a heating pad on my shoulders and get in some quality nap time. I'm just plain exhausted. I'm assuming it has a lot to do with the PIO (progesterone) shots and the patch ... but bleh anyway. Possibility of an early night tonight.

Blessings.

More Excellent news...

Just got the call that the two embryos they were watching WERE able to be frozen so we have 2 little "penguins" on hold should we need them. All in all this cycle has (so far) turned out far better then we had ever hoped.

Started the Vivelle estradiol patch today. Just a little more time down and then back to work starting tomorrow. It will be nice to be able to be up, moving and busy ... keeping my mind off every little twinge and just how long it seems til blood work on March 6th.

*hugs* Thank you all for the continued prayers.

Going Crazy!

Ok, so I'm supposed to stay completely down on bed rest (laying down with 15 short times up for shower, food, etc) and I'm going crazy. I'm not a very good patient and it's sad to say it... but I'd rather be at work. I'm watching a ton of TiVo (Doctor Who, Days of our Lives, Legend of the Seeker, NCIS and other guilty pleasures) reading alot and all in all just wasting time.

So, for anyone who has been here before how long after transfer did you stay flat on your back and what did you do to waste time? =)

Transfer Day!

Really quick update as I can only sit up briefly and am mostly to lay flat because ... we had 2 beautiful embryos transferred today! Now we wait for blood testing on March 6th to find out if we're pregnant. Today wasn't all that bad and I swear the hardest part was going with a full bladder to a 2:30 appt only to not be able to pee until 3:30 and after a lot of poking and prodding. Ooo uncomfy. ;)

We find out Wednesday morning if we were able to freeze 2 extras. This is more then I ever expected and thank you ALL for the huge prayers. They are saying we have upto a 70% success rate for a single birth. Amazing.

Less than 24 hours....

This weekend has gone so slowly! I alternate going from an upset tummy (antibiotics) to having ADHD (steroids) to feeling like I'm going out of my head with my emotions (progesterone). I can't believe that the transfer ... and as I haven't had a phone call from the RE saying anything bad I'm assuming that we are still on for tomorrow. Excited, petrified and anxious all in one. Go me!

Just as a quick update tomorrow I get to end:
Methylprednisolone (slightly decreases natural immune reaction system)
Doxycycline (antibiotic to prevent infection)

Get to keep getting:
Progesterone IM

As a reminder, we had 10 eggs harvested and 6 of those fertilized. Here's hoping for at least 2 beautiful blasts tomorrow for transfer. *fingers crossed*

Holding Pattern

Other than trying to keep myself positive, upbeat and not worried out of my skull nothing new has been happening the last few days. Monday seems so close and yet so far away. This bit of having absolutely no control over how our eggs are doing and just running on faith that Monday WILL happen is for the dogs. Bleh.

Starting last Thursday we have done the progesterone IM shots (butt shots) and you know what... they aren't bad! Nothing compared to that evil spawn of Satan... Repronex. As long as I heat before hand, wiggle my toes during (you can't clench your butt cheeks if you wiggle your toes... go ahead... try it!) and then heat afterwords I couldn't even tell you it happened. Seriously!

Also finishing up this tummy wrecking antibiotic (doxycycline) and steroid that makes me ADHD for about 4 hours (methylprednisolone) ... will be done on Monday with those as well. We're getting towards the finish line...

Praying up a storm!

Another hurdle passed!

Just got the phone call and of the 10 retrieved ... 6 fertilized! So far... so good! Now we just hang on til Monday and the transfer and hope that things progress over the weekend and we have some nice results ready for Monday.

Keep the prayers coming... they are working!

Retrieval Day

Last night had a horrible nightmare that I went in to retrieval and came out to hear there were no eggs. Woke up sweating and my heart just pounding... but it was my #1 worry with this procedure...

I didn't have to worry. I went in at 9:45am this morning and was called back at 10am. Got changed into a sexy and cheeky gown and given a warm blanket. IV started to help with happy juice and then had a short wait. Taken back and I don't remember much other then a couple of painful pokes and some uncomfortable pressure. All in all it was pertty much a breeze.

After a little bit of waiting the news came... 10 eggs! I was praying for anything over 5 and 7 would have been great... but 10! Now to see how they will fertilize and play nice. Thinking some darkness, a little mood music and warm thoughts and prayers should do it. Will hear more tomorrow about what our numbers look like and how things are going. Will post more when I have it.

Again, thank you all for your prayers and thoughts.

Hurdle.... passed!

Got the results of my blood work and although it's not high... it's fine! 1023 where I needed over 1000. Whew.

No more shots (just ovidrel tonight to trigger) and retrieval on Wednesday.
Think happy fertile thoughts... :)

PS: Anyone who has passed this hurdle in the past... what sort of numbers did you have? I'm concerned about the "just over 1000" even though I've been told not to... but you all know how THAT goes.

Prayin for good Blood Work!

Quick note on my lunch hour...

The u/s this morning went really well and I have a pretty big party in Ms Right. Ms Left, however, has some heavy hitters but not nearly as many. Party all you want ladies, you're doing good things! All in all I feel bloated and crampy across the midsection as well as low back. Fun!

I'm currently waiting for the phone call regarding my estrogen levels. We're aiming for 1000 and last friday it was 389. If it comes back in the 700-800 range they are talking about cancelling just going with fertilization ... I need to be in that 1000 range to continue with the harvest on Wednesday (yup, date has been set!)

Good news today:
I get to STOP Follistim injections, Lupron injection and the Repronex injection! I get to add the Ovidrel tonight (both shots) at 11pm which are tiny little things and would mean things are moving along. *BIG OL HAPPY BOOTIE DANCE!

So now I wait for the nurse to call with my estrogen levels... fingers crossed!

Happy Valentine's Day

I wanted to take a moment and thank the Lord for guiding my love, my soul mate and my best friend into my life years ago. I can't imagine a life without him and now to have him not only patiently walking this journey with me ... but also being 110% committed and active (he gives me the injections every AM/PM) as we live the adventure together.

Honey, I love you beyond words.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." 1 Corinthians 13

Completely out of Real Estate

I'm black and blue all across my tummy and it's really starting to get challenging in finding a spot to poke. The Follistim and Lupron are still pretty minor pokes and after 24 hours seem to be healed up... but the damn Repronex takes a solid 3 days to heal up and the huge splotch to go away and that gives enough space for about 2 on left and 2 on right. Pinching is sore!

Got my blood work back from yesterday and my estrogen levels are doing really well. My first was 38, then 188 and then yesterday she said she'd look for something around 380... it was 389. Go me! Trying to keep it in my head that I'm on my way and my eye on the end result. Thanks for all the prayers and "I'm here for you" emails. It really makes a difference.

PS: When I picked up my final bags of meds yesterday I must have looked like "I can't keep doing this..." as the pharmacist looked me straight in the eye and said "remember, not all women get to keep going." Precious words.

TGIF... almost

Well, tomorrow I go in for an update u/s and blood work and I'm hoping things look good. I'm starting to feel pretty emotional at times and my tummy is very, very bruised and hurting quite a bit (and this is only day 4 of stims!). Can't sleep on my stomach anymore and I'm beginning to wonder how I'll get another 5 days of shots with 3-4 a day... yikers.

More updates when I have them. *hugs*

Quick Update...

u/s went well and will hear by 2pm if my u/s and/or blood work suggest a change in my stims dosages. *tick tock*

Ladies who have done the IVF route and gone in for that first u/s following your start of stims (day 3) ... what did you see, find out, etc? I figured I would wait til my Friday morning u/s to really ask questions but from what I was seeing it looked like 5-6 on the right that were getting good sized and 3-4 on the left. What did you see?

Blessings.

Holy Crud, Only Day 2?

Ok, so yesterday was day one on stims. Follistim wasn't that bad, Lupron is old hat and then Repronex kicked me in the butt. Burned going in and today I feel like I've been shot. Definately won't be using that spot on my belly anytime in the near future. I'm really hoping that was a one time occurance... but sweating tonight's poke all the same. Anyone else have problems with the Repronex?

In a nutshell...
Lupron: easy peasy
Follistim: not best friends, but friends
Repronex: definately off my Christmas card list

Here's hoping tonight will be better. *sniffle*

PS: Tomorrow is an u/s and bloodwork day.

Let's Get Ready to... Stim!

Today is day one of stims and I finally feel like I'm doing something. The past few days I've allowed myself to get down and anxious about starting the "big shots" today and I'll be able to update later regarding the Repronex but as for the Follistim this morning that was easy peasy. I swear it was less of a poke then the Lupron shots. Here's hoping the best for the Repronex.

And here's some more pics. Trying to document the journey so I can look back and re-live the fun and emotion. *chuckle*





Ok ladies, let's get to work!

Friday = Sick Day

Well, today I called in sick to work and although I know it was the right call I always feel embarassed and bad about doing so. I have a good 140+ hours sick leave just sitting in the bank but it still feels icky to use them and not get work done.

Last night had a pretty hefty headache starting and was worried it was going to slip into a full on migraine by morning. This morning I woke up to a morning full of strong cramps (CD3), bad headache and some nausea. I think alot of it has to do with the hormones and the Lupron but I also think that not sleeping as well as I could be due to anxiety could have thrown things a bit caddywumpus. After an extra 5 hours this morning a bit of a headache still lingers and some fatigue, but I'm feeling much better.

Anyone else feel really guilty when you call in sick? I wonder how much of it might have been growing up a teacher's kid and and the fact that I needed to be near death to ever miss a day. *smirk*

Baseline!

Went in today for my baseline u/s and blood work for my Estradiol level to see if things are moving along and if I'm ready to continue on and start stims next week. I passed through with flying colors and will start stims on monday with my next u/s and blood work on Wednesday.

Goodie Bags!

Tonight the DH and I went by the pharmacy and picked up the Follistim and Repronex. I'm starting to feel like I'm really into this IVF journey and hot diggy dog there's a lot to do and get ready for. We kick into full swing next week (Tuesday) I will be getting my Follistim (AM), Repronex (PM) and my Lupron (PM).

SO excited! (sarcasim...)

The Follistim looks a bit creepy as it is in a large "pen" that you basically load, lock and dial up your dose and then inject as the pharmacist says "hold it like a dagger and do it like you mean it." DH has already said he'll take care of the prep and I'll get it as a wake-up call at 7:30am. Due to my dose of 225 after the first day (due to the fact the vials are 300 units) I'll get the joy of 2 sticks every morning! Aint life grand?!? The Repronex is also 225 so we have to mix 3 different vials of powder when making that one up each night. More details next week when we jump in with both feet.

Tomorrow morning I go in for baseline bloodwork and u/s to see how my suppression phase has gone. Keep fingers crossed and prayers en route. Aunt Flo kicked in today (CD1) so at least I'm on schedule! This is a very good thing.

See you all tomorrow...

Monday

Normally I have pretty decent Mondays. I'm recharged a bit and ready to get back at things. But today (following two days off) I was swamped from the moment I walked into the office until I walked out. Most of my days at work are fine and I really like being with my co-workers and doing my job that I've done now for 12+ years... but days like today totally sap me. Here's hoping for a good night sleep tonight and tomorrow will be better.

As for the IVF journey I'm mostly in a holding pattern. It feels odd to be off everything but the Lupron injections. My DH and I have those down to a science. Wednesday, however, is when we meet with the pharmacist and learn all about the Follistim and Repronex. Will take those only 8 days (one in AM, one in PM) along with the Lupron... but they sound a bit scarier as they take a lot more prep work to get them ready to inject. Well, we'll learn more on Wednesday.

Here's hoping everyone is having a good week. *hugs* Be well and blessings.